I have five adopted children and then many years later, much to our surprise had a biological child. It was never in our plans...but most definitely in HIS. I was blessed with an amazing pregnancy. Actually, I loved being pregnant, which is surprising because for the most part pregnancy "creeped" me out before I became pregnant.
What I didn't expect during my pregnancy were the feelings I had about my adopted children. There was such a sense of "ache" there as their mom...
An ache because I don't know what emotions there were with the realization that they were going to be born. I know the emotions we had when we found out we were expecting...I won't share those...the words were not exactly "G" rated.
An ache because I could not answer questions like, what did you like to eat when I was in your tummy? did I kick a lot mom? I knew Presley before she even came out...her routine...her movements...her hiccups every morning. But for my other children...I don't know...and probably never will.
I don't even know how much my children weighed at birth...a question they have asked numerous times. We finally just came up with a "weight" together.
The information that I do have about their birth is very little and it is not anything good to share with my children. For two of my kids, we have no pictures of them before the age of 5. To say that some of my children had a rough start to life would be an understatement.
For me as their mom...the love is different. There is a definite difference. It is not that I love one more than the other, the approach is just different...how I get there with them at the end of the day varies.
Regardless of the way their lives began, my prayers are for their lives today and in the future. And there has NEVER been a time for me that I was not thankful to the three moms who carried and gave birth to my beautiful children.
God blessed me with only love and compassion for their moms...sure I could tell some disheartening stories about decisions they made...but what is the point? Because even on their worst day, they loved their children enough to choose a different path for them...a different road and for that I am forever grateful!
